Moonlight
by MNMmie
Summary: There's just too much that time cannot erase. Revised 4/11/12


_These wounds won't seem to heal  
>This pain is just too real<br>There's just too much that time cannot erase  
><em>_**- My Immortal, Evanescence**_

She woke up panting. It did not happen often anymore, but tonight it had. Saleem. He still haunted her. She did not know what to do to make it any better. He had left a trace, a trace that would never be erased. As always she felt the pain, the despair. She felt dirty. Every time she dreamed of Saleem, the men in the camp, the hot, humid cell that kept her at that horrible place, she felt as dirty as she had felt there. Covered in dirt, sweat and blood.

She knew it would be pointless to try and go back to sleep. She swept her legs over the edge of the bed and sat there for a while. It was still dark. She tugged the gun from under her pillow behind her waistband. She had no idea of the time. She gave up on sleeping with a clock next to her bed when she was just back. Tossing and turning was bad enough, she did not have to know how long she had been awake each night.

When her feet got cold she went to the kitchen. 0215 the clock on the oven said. She had only got a mere hour of sleep, or rather, she had to live through almost hour of Saleem tonight. Sighing she put her hands on the edge of the sink and leaned slightly forward. She concentrated on her breathing. That she was awake did not mean Saleem left her alone. Her memories would haunt her until she would tire herself to the point of exhaustion.

That made exercising one of her options. She could go out for a long run… But the second the idea came up in her mind she dismissed it. Running was by far not exhausting enough. It would not help. She wandered over to the living room; the house was covered with darkness. In the living room the moon shone in through the big window there. She slowly walked forward, into the light. With each step she took, more of her body lit up, glowing pale in soft silver light.

The scars were still there, they had not faded anymore than they did in the first few months. A visible, always present reminder of her suffering. Her eyes skimmed over them. She had counted them, memorized them, when she realized they would be with her forever. She knew some wounds had healed without scars, those probably hurt her more than the ones still with her today.

As she felt her memories threatening to take over her mind she walked to the door anyway. She did not stop to put on shoes, she did not stop to take her keys, she did not bother to pull the door close. The wind did it for her. She did not flinch at the sudden sound of the door closing. Her memories had slowly started to hypnotize her into a state of complete numbness. She welcomed it as that happened. She needed it.

When she got to the street she slowly quickened her pace. When she was around the block she was at full speed. She did not feel the raw streets beneath her. Her mind took her over familiar paths; she had run these streets so many times that she needed no presence of mind to guide her.

When she was in the park she found herself not turning back, as she would normally do. She kept running. It did not tire her a bit, but the breeze playing with her cloths, her hair soothed her. She ran into the neighborhood across the park. After a few more blocks she did start to feel her legs. She did not know how long she had been running, but it felt as long. She forced her mind out of its peaceful retreated state, slowing down enough to find where she was. She stopped at the familiar house in the next street.

She stood under the streetlight for a while, looking up at the house. How late would it be, by now? She wondered. He had once told her that she was always welcome, no matter the time. Was she? Was she still? It was an old promise. He made it to her over two years ago, when she had just started to work again. She went a few times, often late at night, but never this late. Now she felt as if she needed his presence as bad as she did back then. Could she really be welcome to enter his home at this hour? He would probably be sleeping. It would be rude to wake him, for no reason at all.

Maybe Abby was right about his superpowers. Just as she turned to walk away, a light switched on at the top floor. Seconds later another one, in the kitchen. She froze. He was not asleep, that much was certain. Then still, what right had she to just go inside? She could not, would not, move from her spot. She heard the backdoor slide open. A dark shadow appeared in the moonlight that shone over the grass. She should walk away, she really should. She could not. Then the shadow moved forward. In the darker corner behind the house she could see his silhouette. And she knew he saw her.

He put down the cup in his hand, as he walked past the front door porch. When he was back in the moonlight, he stopped, on the edge of the grass. He watched her. Suddenly she felt her cold, bare feet. There were goose bumps on her bare arms and legs. It might not be a cold night, but she was dressed for a warm bedroom, not the lower temperatures outdoors. She shivered. He saw.

"Ziver." He whispered it, but she could hear him. He beckoned her to come closer. Slowly she obeyed. When she was within his reach he pulled her closer. His hug enveloped her with warmth. At first she stood stiff against him, then slowly she started to relax and leaned deeper into his embrace.

She did not know when they started, but after a while she felt hot tears slowly rolling down her cheeks. He did not seem to care. He held her, nothing else. After a while he forced her to look at him.

"Let's get inside." He said, wiping away her tears. She did not respond, but she walked with him when he put his hands behind her back. He walked her through the door, through the kitchen, up the stairs. With soft force he put her into his bed. He put her under the covers and crawled in behind her. Taking her in his arms once more, he pulled her close. He whispered to her, soothingly, as he once used to do to lull his daughter to sleep when she woke up at night.

"Sleep, Ziver. Sleep." He mumbled. She felt her eyes flutter, she closed them and slowly she drifted into a dreamless sleep.

_**I would like to know what you think, so leave a review. –MNMmie**_

~ Disclaimer: see profile ~


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